Prayers

So Spencer gave the lesson at FHE tonight and it was on prayers. I found it applying so much to my life and everything I'm going through right now, it's crazy!

Spencer started out with the story of Enos. You know it's so funny because I was feeling so frustrated last night with me being confused about what to do about life that I told my mom I was going to pray all night and all day just like Enos until the Lord gave me an answer or was so annoyed by me complaining to him that he would pound the answer into my head. And now Spud was talking about Enos in his lesson. Man, let me tell you. Spencer talked about how Enos refered to his praying as wrestling. Man, could it be any closer to what I am feeling now? Seriously, I go this way, I go that way, I can't make up my mind. I can, but then things change. I get frustrated at myself, it makes me mad! Spud said that sometimes the Lord allows us to make our own decisions and he trusts us to do that. I understand that, but really, I need some more guidance than that. I need to know what I need to do. I feel like I should go back to AZ to do school. But who knows.

Tomorrow I am meeting with a physical therapist to talk about questions I have with the field. The good thing is that he went to the school I'm looking into and I want to know all about that too. I'm excited, I have so many questions, but I can't volunteer at the hospital there, not until after the new year, and it's driving me crazy. If I go home, it will be around the 4th of Jan or so. GRRR!

This weekend I am confirmed to go to Holland, I just have to get the church's hostel taken care of. I am excited. I need a trip; what better time than to include the temple in it. Rome is next weekend, and earlier today I was mad for buying my ticket without having a hotel/hostel lined up. And then I was mad cuz I'm trying to save to go home and I'm spending 200$$ on a plane fare (I know that's not a lot for going to Rome). But the good news, with plane and hostel it's only 250. Now I just have to get the money for like the taxi to the hostel. I hear the airport is not close to Rome at all! Grr. Oh well. TAXI would be fun to get to drive through and see Rome first.

My trip to Berlin may be getting postponed. I need to get new tires for my car and that is not cheap. Ah well, I hope Sis. G will understand. After that trip, no more traveling for me,I'm done. Man. So, I've been jabbering on about my day and weeks to come.

I was so excited to get home today and blog. I'm happy to finally have a place where I can blog without needing to travel to another city to do so. I mean those are always fun to brag on, but yeah, it's good to just vent sometimes.

So I have deemed our outreach/institute center as the Marriage Training Center. Funny thing is one girl said it's just like the REAL MTC because you can't really date in either MTCs. You know what? I've been on more dates while in Germany and around this MTC than I did while I was in AZ. Is that sad? Are my standards being lowered? I don't think so, I just think I finally found some people who like to have some fun. In AZ all the guys were hung up on stupid girls. Ga'll. If and when I go back to AZ I really hope things have changed. I'm not going back for the social life of it, I'm not going back to date, I just don't want to be stuck making friends with only girls haha, we all know how I handle that kind of situation.

Well, I should get off to bed, it's 0100 and I have to be up early to go by the bookstore and buy my books for my History class. Funny thing: I have more college books on my bookshelf than I'm sure any bookstore for any college does. Ok, maybe not, but honestly, I have a TON!